(Awakened Origins Series: Part 3 of 3)
You’ve spent years — maybe even decades — seeking. Not casually, not naively, but with sincerity. With devotion. You’ve burned through teachings, teachers, identities, and illusions. You’ve meditated, investigated, surrendered, and waited.
And now something quieter is beginning to emerge — an acceptance. A kind of quiet surrender that arrives not from understanding more, but from the collapse of your ability to go any further. Now, you’re open to the possibility:
What if innocence was never lost?
The one who never searched has been present the entire time. Before you had a name, a story, a history — you were. You didn’t yet know how to pretend to be someone. You simply experienced. There was no filter, no narrative, no need to define what was happening. You hadn’t yet decided that something needed to be different.
Then came the world. It gave you a name. It gave you roles, expectations, consequences. You learned to adjust — to shape yourself to be accepted. Slowly, your native state of being was replaced by a self-image. One crafted not from truth, but from feedback, protection, and performance. And all of it was held together by a thread of guilt — a thread put in place long ago when you decided you owed the world your attention.
That to not engage the world was to claim that you were lacking nothing. A claim you couldn’t back up… because you weren’t sure who it was that was whole.
Guilt is the reminder that who you are isn’t enough. That something must always be added, corrected, hidden, or proven. Who are you to think you could just stop — just throw in the towel?
But guilt was imposed. It came from outside. It was given to you. Which means… it’s not real. It’s not native to your being. It’s a psychological inheritance — not inner truth.
Innocence, on the other hand, was never imposed. It was always there. It didn’t arrive. It was simply unguarded presence — and it remains that way. Beneath the roles. Beneath the effort. Beneath the performance.
Every attempt to improve yourself is secretly a continuation of guilt. Every identity built on effort is an echo of shame. Every strategy of becoming someone only proves the belief that you’re not already enough.
But you are. You always were.
Only the mind-made identity believes in guilt. Only no-mind is innocent.
This isn’t something to achieve. It’s not a state that you cultivate. Innocence is your birthright. It’s what remains when belief dissolves, when trying ends — when you finally allow yourself to stop pretending.
You have every right to be free.
Free from guilt. Free from shame.
Free from the exhausting loop of self-improvement.
Fear is belief. And innocence is the end of belief — the inheritance of what belief could only ever promise, but never deliver.
Innocence came before fear. Before knowledge. Before the impulse to protect yourself from life. And beneath every layer of fear, innocence still remains. It was never destroyed — only buried.
But fear must remain constant in order to keep it buried. It must whisper endlessly that you’re not safe. Not whole. Not done. And so long as you listen, the search continues.
Fortunately, silence is always here — waiting in the background. And it can have your ear… if you allow it to.
The moment you stop fueling fear with your attention — even for a second — innocence resurfaces.
When you realize you’re reading a book, you don’t have to keep going until you get to the end.
You just close it up. Put it down.
No real loss occurs.
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“And now something quieter is beginning to emerge — an acceptance. A kind of quiet surrender that arrives not from understanding more, but from the collapse of your ability to go any further.”
This sounds so true for me, and the “something quieter” grows every day, for which I am so very grateful. I had come to believe that this peace was not for me,- maybe next lifetime – but here it is!
And in no small measure due to your most generous support over the years, Kyle. <3
The liberating sound of silence… yes… here it is!
Grateful to be able to be a part of this journey as well John 🙏
“Every attempt to improve yourself is secretly a continuation of guilt. Every identity built on effort is an echo of shame. Every strategy of becoming someone only proves the belief that you’re not already enough.”
Whenever I find myself slipping down into one of these rabbit holes, I ask myself, “Is that what I really want? That… or freedom? And freedom wins every time! And my whole body and mind smile with relief.
Thank you, Kyle, for helping me to remember again! 💕
Every time! That’s something to celebrate…🎉 and what a gift to be ready to meet those rabbit holes with such a question ❤️
Amazingly clear…………….your communication gets clearer and more precise every passing year…….THANK YOU.
Like a good wine!🍷😜 Glad to hear that my friend
Kyle, literally that is the best thing I have ever read/heard! That is everything, the whole ballgame! Oh my! I don’t even know what to say, so I’ll say thank you so much for putting that into words! So very pertinent and timely! ❤️❤️❤️
I’m so glad to hear that Kay! ❤️🎉😄
Uncover.
✨ https://www.kylehoobin.com/uncovering-your-origin-story/